Slug & Lede

Danielle Lierow’s story, The Girl in the Window, written by Lane DeGregory, told of a child neglected by her mother who finds hope and love in the care of her newly adoptive parents. The extremely poor conditions of which Danielle had lived in Plant City, Florida, kept her at age seven, from being able to go to the bathroom on her own or even feed herself. With the help of her adoptive parents, Danielle has made great strides in her abilities, she can now go to the bathroom, eat on her own and even convey emotions. This tragic story encompasses the many struggles Danielle’s journey has created in the hopes that one day she will be able to speak and function just as any individual would.

 In its entirety the story was quite compelling. This, for me, was an immediate strength. Although the story was rather lengthy, the in-depth details provided the listener with a knowledge and understanding of the complexities of Danielle’s situation.

 The story also provided the perspectives of various individuals connected to Danielle, from her adoptive parents to her speech therapist and finally to her mother. The story grasped each individual’s opinion, in turn creating an astounding depth to the piece.

 The reader’s voice throughout the piece was very pleasant. The reader was able to capture and convey the emotion presented by the different individuals in Danielle’s life, the way they have interacted with her now and the hope they have for her in the future.

 At times however, the reader would pause to swallow. These instances were made quite clear, as the action could be perfectly heard. I felt this issue distracted me, ultimately taking away from the vigor of the piece. If I were to re-edit this story, I would delete these areas, replacing the noise with a short pause. This would eliminate the distraction without creating an awkward transition.

 The natural sound of a silent room I felt was most appropriate for the piece. Being that this was a story being read, I felt any other sound would only have taken away from its gripping context. Within the background sound however, there were instances when the reader would turn a page. I really like this idea, as I felt it gave the immediate action depth, but her volume levels would fluctuate, making for an awkward few seconds. In order to fix this problem I would suggest a page turner, which would eliminate the reader’s need to shift her placement.

 Finally, I felt the media used for the piece was the most effective. The simple audio really allowed for the listener to focus on what the reader was saying. I felt anything added such as a slideshow would have taken away from the story itself. If only several pictures were added, demonstrating Danielle’s progress in the two years following her foster care, this could help enhance the audio.

 Overall, I felt the story was incredibly compelling, presented in an almost flawless manner.